Tired today

Today is Wednesday and we didn't have to go anywhere. I wanted to stay home and bake chippies and fry chicken tonight. H and I are headed to Dallas tomorrow to leave her with my folks for the weekend. We will go to Whole Foods Friday so we got to stay home today. We spent a chunk of the morning playing outside with the Easter gifts and also a couple hours out this afternoon. Somehow, with all the staying home, I am so tired. T has a party that is all afternoon and evening on Saturday and it will be easier to have H with the grandparents than to juggle schedules. And I can clean out her closet and some of the drawers in her room without making her sick. I do have to work as well so it won't be a lot of work around here done but anything is better than nothing. Hopefully I will make some progress on the room to make it more ready for baby and H. Maybe I can get some laundry done on Saturday and Sunday mornings as well. I have lots of diapers to wash and just can't get them done in the evenings with all the "regular" laundry to be done.

We had our first midwife appt yesterday and it went fine. I am so steeped in traditional medicine that even though I don't want their approach, I am afraid of the alternatives. Crazy, I know! Traditional medicine has done nothing for us except make fun of our problems and make things worse. But it is what I know and understand, there is a comfort zone there. I don't want to be treated as a high risk OB patient because I am not. But there is no middle ground... either we do the hospital birth and fight/argue about what we don't want them to do to us or we go the birthing center route and takes our chances. Midwives are actually safer and provide great care, as good as the OB/Gyn stats for most women. So here I am, talking to myself about all this again. Just be done with it and stop chewing over the decision!

I am going to start the washer again and go off to bed!