Thursday, December 17, 2009

Gah

Poor baby girl. This new electronic crap has sent her to a very bad place. The new washer smells *horrid* and I have no choice. Thank goodness the laundry room can be closed off (mostly) and there is an air filter in there. But if I turn on the heat, Skunk refluxes worse than ever and doesn't sleep, oh, and she poops all the time too. I guess that is better than the miserable constipation? I don't know but this chemical sensitivity stuff is killing me and her right now. I can't wash - diapers, clothes, washies... you name it. So I have huge piles of clothing, sheets and I am washing diapers by hand in the bath tub. This whole situation is just too complicated. I can't seem to shake wanting to make things better for the girls but it means that we go to great and sometimes ridiculous lengths here at home just to try and keep them eating and sleeping. Please God, help me to endure. I just can't seem to stand and am just crawling along right now. If I didn't have to function for them, I think I would just curl into a ball and stay. I am just that overwhelmed.

Psalm 13 fits again...

How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?

How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?

Look on me and answer, O Lord, my God. Give light to my eyes or I will sleep in death;

My enemy will say, "I have overcome him," and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation.

I WILL sing to the Lord, for he has been good to me.















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