Sunday, May 31, 2009

Broken

My heart is broken. I can't record my thoughts other than to cry and mourn. I want to pour out my heart here but it hurts too much yet. I love my Amy dog and will miss her for the rest of my life. Nothing or no one can ever replace her unconditional love and acceptance of me.

*sobs from a broken heart*

Amy is sick

Today is Sunday and my precious hounder has been laying around (more than normal) for the last 24 hours. She will get up and walk but has to be really encouraged to do so. We keep offering water and she will drink. She hasn't eaten since Friday (almost 2 days). I love her so much and I am not ready to lose her. I am praying that we can keep her hydrated until we can take her to her vet on Monday. She is such a good girl and is 9 years old. I hope we have some good years with her ahead.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Update here

Saturday (May 16th) H lost her first tooth. That lower front incisor had been hanging there for about a day. But she didn't want us to pull it. We kept reassuring her that it takes longer than a day for a tooth to get loose enough to fall out. I was at work but T says that she came into the kitchen giggling, tooth in hand. So the "tooth fairy" visited and left her money, 50 cents! She was very pleased and I was pleased to get by with 50 cents.

And Little One is getting tighter and tighter in it's quarters. I feel as though I have a watermelon on my front. I am still struggling mightly with leg cramps. This is probably something that I will just have to endure the rest of the pregnancy. But the kicks and turns are well worth it. I can't turn over in bed easily any more (for about the last week). We had a midwife appointment yesterday and everything continues to look good. Head down, heartbeat good, mom tired... ;)

I am working on finishing Nana's Christmas present. I would like to get Gran's made though H wants to make her a bracelet, not a scarf and earwarmer. Maybe we will do a scarf and bracelet combo?

I have to work this weekend but T and I have Monday off together. Then I have the last weekend in May off. I am going to meet Kathy Kirk and start nursing home work tomorrow. The only thing I don't have is a beeper. Somehow have to get my hands on one this week! I don't want those people to have my home or cell numbers. Must do the beeper! I am praying that the NH works out so that we can have Sundays to be home together. And it will fill in the gap for not working 8+ shifts a month. Though it does mean that I have to make phone calls daily and find time for visits during the week. Again, I am praying both for stamina and wisdom.

Off to bed for me!

Monday, May 11, 2009

Finally happened

H just told me (as she is trying to eat rutabaga) that she thinks her tooth is loose. And sure enough, she has her first loose tooth! She has been praying and wanting a loose tooth and what does she do? Starts crying! ROFL What a funny girl! My baby isn't baby-like anymore. *sniff* I am sure that when she does lose it, there will be even more crying though.

I survived my second to last 3 day weekend. I haven't been taking bicarb after working since it makes my leg cramps worse. But I have been struggling hard with recovering after work. So Saturday and Sunday, I did the bicarb. I felt much better the day after but the leg cramps are bad. I think I prefer leg cramps to how I feel post chemical exposure. But I woke four times with leg cramps, the last time was pretty bad - calf, foot and front of my leg were cramping up. That front muscle cramping just does me in, it hurts so bad.

I also got this awful thing taken off my nose this morning. It even looks better with stitches in there, rather than the big bulbous purple granuloma. It is achey and hurtful but I am so glad that it is gone.

It is room time and I am tired after working all weekend. H isn't excited about room time though. ;)

Thursday, May 07, 2009

Can't sleep

Torture! I woke up at 356am this morning and haven't been able to go back to sleep. It is 504am right now. I laid in bed until 445am and was so hungry that I had to come and eat something. So a piece of cereal and a glass of water later... I will have to pee so bad in an hour since I drank water. Ah, the life of a pregnant woman! ;)

We are going to Whole Foods this morning. I wish I could sleep but I think that I just have lots whirling through my brain. T and I were talking about the nursing home NP work last night. I just don't know what to do. It will cost about $2500 to start up as an independent contractor with the bulk of that cost as the liability insurance. I don't know if I am going to like the work... but work is work. I can do it for 6-12 months to make sure we make money on the deal and then stop if it isn't working for us. But I also want his input on spending that much money at the start of this. We really do need that 2 grand for stuff around here. If I start in a week or so, I can start billing and make back that money before maternity leave in July. Just lots to ponder! I keep praying that God will throw roadblocks in my way if I am not to do the NH work. I wonder if the start up cost is not a roadblock. Or at least enough of a speedbump to warn me off. I do so much better with shorter shifts of 4-6 hours with a baby at home. Committing to 10-11 hours at the ED is almost more than I can deal with.

Ah, now can you see why I am awake and cannot sleep! Since I am not hungry anymore, I am going back to bed to see if I can fall back asleep. Praying usually will put me to sleep as well! Off to talk!

Sunday, May 03, 2009

Another 3 day weekend DONE!

Tonight is Sunday and I have worked the last 3 days. Tired isn't the word, exhausted/wrung out/done is more my status tonight. The weekend wasn't bad, just lots of work for a pregnant lady. I did wear my support stockings all three days though and I think that helped my feet a ton. I have another three day weekend next weekend and then only the Sat/Sun combos left this month. I am so relieved. Back when I signed up for these longer weekends, it was ok and even worth it to have the last weekend of the month off. Now I am just tired. But the money will come in handy for maternity leave and for buying bedding for the kiddos. *giggle* kiddos! Amazing to think that we will soon have two children.

Speaking of that, this little one has been flipping and moving today. I love, love that feeling. Nothing reassures this mom more than those pushes, flutters and turns. But my bladder doesn't always do so well. ;)

Today, H and T made a trip to Gran and Poppy's. They seemed to have a great time and H was so tired that she fell asleep on the couch before I even got home at 745p tonight. She and T watched Lilo & Stitch on Friday (stayed up til 10p) and then was up until 915p last night. So she was tired already and then to run around and play at the grandparents just pushed her to tiredness. She doesn't sleep late so she didn't catch up the last 2 mornings on sleep. So she crashed tonight.

This house is pretty messy. She and I desperately need to fold clothes as no one has any underwear folded anymore. We have clean, just in the big pile in the laundry basket. Ooops! We also need to sweep and cook tomorrow as there are no chippies or veggies in reserve. And we have a end of school party on Tuesday with a midwife appt in the afternoon. Thank goodness that we school at home and I don't have to run her to school every morning. I enjoy our more leisurely pace of being at home and just hanging together and playing outside.

I did more knitting last week but haven't finished the scarf I started. I need to post progress pics though. It is really pretty and the colorway is Selkie - black, purple, blue and green. Just beautiful!

I am off to brush my teeth and fall into bed. Sweet dreams to me!